I scrapped another writing project. I still have it saved, because I don’t like to throw things away, but I’m not working on it anymore and I don’t know if I will ever go back to it. It started to get to depressing to work on. This sucks, because I thought things were going well.

I got frustrated by the ending. You know, the point of the story that I was working toward. I liked the ending until I realized that it was a twist to make it look as if the characters were going to win, and then they lose so that one character dies and the other two at left scarred. Okay, not so happy.

Then I stopped to think about my other stories. Then I realized that every single story involved clever twists that resulted in snatching away the happy ending at the last moment.

That is really depressing.

Are they bad? I don’t know. I’m sure some people like stories that end this way. I can think of a few that I appreciated. But in general, I don’t like them. I actually hate them, usually. They aren’t the kind of stories that I want to write. So why have I been writing them? I tried to think about better alternatives, but they all sound stupid.

Why do I have a problem with happy endings? is this another one of my psychological scars that I need to heal, because I don’t believe in happy endings somewhere down in my subconscious? I hate that thought. I guess I need to fix that. I guess I will try to write a new story, start fresh, because thinking about trying to fix old attempts sounds too hard. I hate that I am quitting halfway through again, but I am just beating my head against the wall.